I Think I’ll Have A Normal Name For This Blog Today…

This blog that I’m currently typing as I think has not been prepared for before hand like most of my other blogs.  I’ve been chillin all day and I don’t intend to stop chilling anytime soon lol.  It’s summer time, why wouldn’t I want to just chill and not stress unless I had to?

Shit, I’m alive and young-ish, what’s there not to like?  You know, I think I’ll just start talking a little bit more about myself then maybe other topics will come up.  Fair warning, my thoughts might be random and all over the place haha.

Hmm….I guess I’ll just list a few things about me

1. My favorite colors are blue, white, and black

2. I’m a shy person when I don’t know how to act around people

3. I have 5 siblings

4. I’m hesitant of losing weight because I think I would hate the way people would react (I’d hate for them to like me just because I may be more aesthetically pleasing, yet I would hate to continued to be ignored after all the work I put into losing the weight)

5. Seeing people with hope moves me to tears

6. I love music more than the average person

7. I believe that I have a lot of untapped potential to do many things, I just don’t put forth the effort for even reasons that I don’t know

8. I’m a pretty laid back and simple guy, but in order to break up the monogamy I like to do fun things every chance that I get

9. Almost always, If I try to achieve things that really want, I fail to obtain it

10. I love reading, partying, playing video games, chilling, thinking, weight lifting, music, and existing

11. I think my personality is the most conflicting that I’ve ever come across

12. I see something attractive in almost every girl that I see and I rarely think a girl is completely unattractive

13. I’d rather meet the girl that I would marry and be with right now so we could begin the rest of my life now than to waste time with women that I probably will not be with later on in life

14. I think someone that is awkward towards someone else because they like them is the most honest that feelings can get

15. Yeah, that’s all I can think of for right now

I just remembered how I felt coming to college.  I realized that I thought the same thing about college as I felt coming from elementary school to middle school:  OMG! I’m soo much more mature now that I am going to a different school with older people!  And guess what?  I came to realize something….

People never change automatically when they’ve been doing things for years.  They may rapidly change, but never immediately, unless the change isn’t real.  So, if I know this, then why did I expect people fresh out of high school to not like high schoolers?  Again, my naiive and optimistic hopes are proven wrong.  As a matter of fact, I think the kids at my high school were more adult than many of the kids that go to my college.  Maybe because we were exposed to way more adult things than what most were at Soka?  Idk, there are many factors to consider when thinking about things like this, but my main point was this:  think about all the factors of things before assuming something.

I recently asked a close uncle of mines to impart some of his wisdom on me for my life from what he has experienced in his life and this is what he told me in a nutshell:  Be a good King within your life.  The true power of a King is to see everything from every angle.  Do you think a good King can protect his kingdom and his people if he doesn’t think his decisions out thoroughly?  So, be a good King;  have fun and enjoy life, protect the ones that you love, and always think things through and have a backup plan.

So, applying to thinking things through, I think I’ve done a lot of things that I thought that I thought through, but I actually hadn’t.  When people tell me about things that we’ve done together or things that I’ve done, I always think “Why didn’t I think about that before I did it?” Maybe it’s a learn-as-you-live kinda thing….maybe it just shows the extent of my intellect and ability to analyze things? Who knows….

Now that I’m thinking things through and trying to change from the past, I thinking of seriously switching up the swag.  I mean not half-assing it nor changing into a different person, but seriously switchin up the game that I’m kickin out.  Personally, I’d rather stop the games and just be real n find the wifey already, but I’m young, so I still have to present myself in a way that appeals to women so that courting can ensue aka spittin game.  I think I wanna spend about 500$ on new clothes and shoes because things are expensive for guys that like loose clothing and for shoes that are around size 11.  Maybe another 500 on some jewelry that I’m interested in.  Another 200$ on accessories like hats, hoodies, ect.  By the way, this is all wishful thinking- what i buy might not even come close to this amount, but I do known that I won’t spend any more than this on it though.  And I list this amount because I haven’t had any new things for a long time now (going on 3 years now) and with an update in attire, why not a swag make-over as well.  As for how to achieve this, it will take a lot of thinking of how I want to present myself to people and will also involve a lot of shopping….

Ok, what do y’all think about this situation: What do you do when your words have no power?

What happens when there is no difference between the words pretty and beautiful?  What happens when there is no difference between the words darn and fuck?  How about good and magnificent?  If we forget the meaning that words have, do they have any power left?  Here’s the real question:  If this power is lost, can it ever be returned?  I’ve never seen words regain their power after they are lost.  That happens with my vocabulary a lot.  As a matter of fact, more so that I would like it to.  I like to use words that accurately describes things, and weaker and stronger words play a big role in that too.  For example, if I call a girl gorgeous instead of pretty, cute, or attractive, then I mean it that way.  I believe that if they deserve that caliber of a word, then switching it up to just call them only cute wouldn’t accurately describe their looks, not including the other implications of doing that.

What’s the problem with that?  When people forget the power that words have (maybe power can be interchanged with rank or implication), what do they become?  Man, I’m too tired to talk about this all day, but I’ve had my power essentially taken away, so hopefully the power will one day return.  Or better yet, the other people who do not care about the power of the words that I use can solve the situation by thinking about the words that I use.  I think the person hearing the words can choose to give power to words.  But then, do we really need words to have power over another word?  *Sigh* I’ll save that debate for another day.

So yeah, those are my thoughts for today.  And sorry, I’m too lazy to proofread this time lol.

P N BC (Peace N Be Easy)

James Shonin Kelly III